Happy summer to you! Have you taken time for some summer fun?  In Connecticut, we are anticipating a heat wave this week, so I look forward to cooling off at the beach some time in the next few days.

I’ve been out of touch for quite some time.  So, where have I been?

In the past 9 months, I’ve been experiencing some major life hurdles, including a divorce (and name change), a move, and a long-term illness.  While I have been busy coaching and consulting during this time, I did take a break from a majority of my teaching, blogging, and other writing.  I just couldn’t do it all.

You might be thinking, “Wow, this is personal.  Why is she telling me this?”

Well first, because it’s the truth.  And, I’m a firm believer in the truth.

And second, because I want to demonstrate a point. 

As business people, we always try to present our best selves to the world.  We put on a big smile and act like everything is OK, even when it’s not, because we don’t want anyone to know we are struggling.  We try to keep things quiet, because we think it’s bad for business.

There does come a point, however, when it stops working.  The facade begins to crumble.  Afterall, even business people are human beings.  By pure virtue of being alive, many of us will face a personal challenge at some point in our lives that will affect our work.

You might be thinking that you are doing a good job hiding it, but customers and clients can see the cracks.  Somehow you just aren’t the same.  Your quality of work suffers, you are slow to respond, and you just aren’t able to deliver like you used to.  You know it, and they know it.  You are not fooling anyone.

It’s like leaks springing from a dam.  When you’ve got more holes spewing water than fingers to plug them, it’s time to come clean.  It’s better to be honest and make the appropriate arrangements to care for yourself and your clients.  You may need to take a break, hire help, or refer customers elsewhere to get their immediate needs met.  While this may translate into a loss of business, it can also save your business.  Because if your dam is starting to crack, people will leave anyway, but they’ll never come back.  But when you are honest, most people will stand by you — and even root for you!

Now mind you, I’m not an advocate for sharing intimate personal details with business contacts.  But when I have shared  my personal challenges even at a very surface level, I get nothing but respect and support.  By being open and transparent, I’m actually building trust and credibility.  I’m also creating opportunities for new solutions to arise, because people will often step in to help me, or they will back off and give me the space I need.  But none of this would happen without having that first, difficult conversation. 

I’d like to thank all of those in my business circles who have said kind words, lent me a hand, supported me, and cheered me on.  You better believe that those are the folks I’m going to do business with!